We’re not going to lie, we sorda hoped Game of Thrones would at some point turn into a weird centaur orgy. But to our surprise HBO’s not-so-typical fantasy saga spares us the excess unicorns, wizards, and dragons, and has instead replaced these typicalities with severed heads, breasts, and brothels. And we don’t hate it. David Benioff and D.B. Weiss have us taking notes and drawing character maps, totally hooked on the series that originated from the Game of Thrones book series written by George R.R. Martin. 

If you’re a sci-fi/fantasy nerd searching for some Gandalf wisdom, you won’t find it here. In the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros, power is a game; “the King shits and the hand wipes.” Crazy men are at war for the throne, and their evil plots to takeover and reign enfold, along with a lot of kink and some disturbing incestuous love. And in the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros, it’s every man for himself,  “when you play the game of thrones, you either win or die, there is no middle ground.” The noble families of Westeros will do everything they can, along with their armies, to ensure that the seat upon the throne is theirs.

Season II premieres tonight at 9PM, so you still have significant time to get caught up and get through season I. We don’t want to spoil anything for anyone, so if you’re reading, consider this our endorsement. You’ll be glad that you did.

(sources: MTV.com & HBO Watch)