Gunshots, neon, and pink unicorn beanies: we saw Spring Breakers and here’s what happened

Spring. Break. It’s as if nothing as cool has ever happened in your entire life—or well, at least up until that seemingly crucial moment in time: somewhere along the lines of being halfway through college, pretty careless, no obligations. Just a chance to getaway for a week or so and potentially be on MTV for .2 seconds. And neon. Lots of neon.

That’s exactly what you get from Harmony Korine’s (Kids, Gummo) ever-so-appropriately named movie Spring Breakers, with a lot more, um, debauchery and unbelievable almost Grand Theft Auto-like shenanigans that leave you wondering about all that’s happening on the Florida coastline during that oh so lovable spring break time of year.

Spring Breakers’ intro reminded me of something borrowed from Gaspar Noé’s 2009 movie Enter the Void combined with a very extended Girls Gone Wild clip, sexualizing the stereotypical spring break female in a somewhat humiliating way—prefacing that this movie would not be censored at all whatsoever; this movie would be screaming loud and was probably made to leave us feeling a bit uneasy about these spring breakin’ youngins.

The story begins when four girls, Faith (Selena Gomez), Candy (Vanessa Hudgens), Brit (Ashley Benson), and Coddy (Rachel Korine aka Harmony Korine’s beau), who’ve been planning to go on spring break together for a while, find out they don’t exactly have enough cash to make it. So they decide to steal a car and rob a restaurant while smashing hammers in tables to get that spring break bling. Seriously.

When they get the money and finally make it, things go from enjoying a pretty sunset to drunkenly snorting lines off tables (so lots of boobs.)

Faith, the “good girl” in the group, who is somewhat detached from the other three in that she’s shown participating actively in bible study groups, is always passively giving in to Candy, Brit, and Coddy’s self-indulgent escapades, but doesn’t really stand up for herself completely until things start getting real and the four girls get caught partying by the police—when James Franco’s kind of hilarious character Alien who’s really into his sh*t (like really, really into his sh*t!) bails them out and takes the rebellious and thrill-seeking girls “under his wing.”

Naturally Alien is attracted to Faith, claiming he “really likes her,” but when she’s finally had enough of her friends and Alien’s lifestyle, booking it back home, he quickly turns to the other girls to get what he needs. And let’s just say after that stuff gets weird. Real weird.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure everybody’s spring break doesn’t end up in a jail then appearing in court while just so happening to stumble into a local rapper named Alien; but the way Korine shows how people can be influenced by the darkside of this hedonistic lifestyle triggered by the over-glorified vision of spring break says a lot about this repulsive mentality.

I wasn’t  100% satisfied with the movie only because the whole “drink a bunch of Natty Light until you pass out” thing never excited me in college, and Korine’s movie probably coulda been summed up in 45 minutes, but if you’re looking to be entertained for a couple hours definitely go see Spring Breakers. Just don’t expect to leave the theater fulfilled.

(photo via The Movie Blog)